Stewie: Hello people. Today I am interviewing a man who doesn’t even know what paper is. Oh God, this is going to be absolutely dreadful.

Fred Flintstone: Hi Stewie. What is this so-called “paper” you are talking about?

Stewie: It is a thing that you write on. The paper is a very thin sheet that comes from trees.  If this entire interview, is you asking me questions I will have to kill you. 

Fred Flintstone: That sounds great Stewie! Do you want to go bowling?

Stewie: Who the hell, do you think you are? You want to go bowling during the interview, right? Jesus Christ, you were one of those babies who escaped the womb crying, weren’t you?  

Fred Flintstone: I don’t remember if I cried or not. Keep in mind; when I was born people didn’t even have hieroglyphics.

Stewie: Oh yes, I almost forgot that you were born in the past. I have one question; did anyone ever make dinosaurs do their dirty work for them?

Fred Flintstone: No, no, no. Ha-ha-ha! Crime wasn’t invented back then.

Stewie: Then how did people slaughter other annoying people that they didn’t like? If I were alive back then, well, you wouldn’t be here. Ha!

Fred Flintstone: We didn’t believe in murder back then. Murder is bad. Bad! 

Stewie: You know, I can’t even find a word strong enough to insult you personality. There is no word. Annoying is not a strong enough word.

Fred Flintstone: Irritating?

Stewie: No…

Fred Flintstone: Infuriating?

Stewie: No… I got it, Maddening!

Flintstone: Yahoo! Ack ack a dack, dack dack a ack!

Stewie: Ditto!

Fred Flintstone: Wanna go bowling?

Stewie: I swear to God, if you say one more annoying thing, I will kill you. I will! I swear to God. You will die and go to Hell!

Fred Flintstone: I should get you a shrink. I know this great shrink that just hatched.

Stewie: Well, I’ll have to see him. I love taking advice from birds.

Fred Flintstone: Me too.  

Stewie: I was being sardonic, you incredibly annoying son of a bitch!

Fred Flintstone: When was the word “sardonic” invented?

Stewie: Right after your show went off the air. People made up the word sardonic when people started saying, “It is so sad, that The Flintstones went off the (censored) air.”

Fred Flintstone: Yes, I find that one door shutting is another door opening. I mean, when my show got cancelled, I got to see Jesus.

Stewie: Really? What was he like?

Fred Flintstone: He was always telling people what to do. I mean, always! In fact, I’m the only living person that knows what Jesus was like. That is why I wrote the last half of “The Passion of the Christ.”

Stewie: That would explain why Jesus screamed “Yabba Dabba Doo!” when he was carrying the cross. It would also explain why he kept shouting, “Shut the hell up, Kazoo!” out of nowhere.

Fred Flintstone: Yeah, Jesus was a good guy though.

Stewie: Kind of a momma’s boy don’t you think?

Fred Flintstone: Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Stewie: Yes, but I don’t want this interview to get censored so lets get off the topic of religion.

Fred Flintstone: Okay, so what do you want to talk about?

Stewie: Now I heard somewhere that your show, was the first ever reality show, right?

Fred Flintstone: Yes, yes it was.

Stewie: Then, why did it have a laugh track?

Fred Flintstone: What the hell is a laugh track?

Stewie: Never mind, caveman. Well, this concludes, yet another crappy interview. This is Stewie saying “ If I had a bullet for every time a person gave me a bad review, I wouldn’t get bad reviews anymore.” Goodbye.